When you think of someone who is naturally confident, you have to imagine their self talk includes positive affirmations, such as “I like myself,” even if it’s subconscious. Wouldn’t you think then, that anyone could gain confidence by repeating this same kind of positive self talk?
A former mentor of mine swears by this concept. I’ll admit it’s taken me some time to actually believe my affirmations–at first it’s like accepting a compliment you don’t think you really deserve. But as they say, if you want to be better at something, do more of it. So start small and apply this self talk to a specific situation, (to be relevant here), “I love how I look today. I am a great dresser.” Try not to use any negative language (i.e., instead of saying, “I don’t look too bad today,” you’d say, “I look amazing today”). The next step is making a habit of sharing these positive messages with yourself throughout the day. Say, “I like myself,” over and over when you’re getting ready in the morning. It will quickly spill into everything you do. And because you like yourself, you’ll like your decisions, you’ll like how you interact with people, and how you smile, walk, talk, act, etc. Ultimately, you’ll like who you are and what you have to offer this world. Soon your confidence will come from a genuine acceptance of and gratitude for your unique qualities and you’ll start to admire even your weirdest quirks and shortcomings, because they too, make up the complete package of who you are. And there’s no one on earth exactly like you.
Truly liking yourself doesn’t come with certain conditions either (i.e., I’ll like myself when I lose 20 pounds, or I’ll like myself when I dress more like so-and-so). It’s a full acceptance of who you are right now in this moment. And it’s the most motivating feeling there is (you may even get to losing those 20 pounds, but you’ll do it loving yourself along the way). When you truly love yourself, you can feel your unique potential and that innate desire to create something, to share your talents and to inspire others starts to take flight.
Have you ever used affirmations to build your confidence?
Read more about my Self Talk series here.