5 Fears of a First-Time Mom

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owlet baby monitor | lamp base: anthropologie {old; similar owl design here; love this style} | lamp shade: anthro {old; love these colorful shades: 12 + 3} | picture frame: urban outfitters {old}

Now that I’ve finally started maternity leave and I’m down to these final weeks of pregnancy, I’m starting to realize just how real this upcoming transition to mommyhood is going to be. Most days I’m excited, but I’d be lying if I didn’t admit I have bouts of anxiety, too. This is something I have never done before. What if I can’t do it? Some of the things I’m most afraid of include:

  1. Baby’s cries – I’ve heard people say you eventually learn the different cries your baby makes and exactly what they mean. That sounds amazing, but does it happen for everyone? Having zero experience here, I’m afraid I won’t be able to interpret my baby’s cries and that he won’t get what he needs from me. {This is an open invitation for you to share your tips and recommendations with me!}
  2. Nursing – Breastfeeding is an endless topic of conversation I bring up with every mom I talk to. I’ve heard the horror stories of mastitis, the cracking, bleeding, toe-cringing pain… I’m hopeful I’ll be the exception, but it sounds like nursing is typically difficult for everyone, until it clicks. I’m planning to take a personal nursing class with Lindsey Shipley from Lactation Link next week, so I’ve been jotting down all my questions and will definitely share an update on how it helped me once baby arrives.
  3. Choking – Matt and I constantly discuss our fear of our baby choking and not being able to help him. We’re looking into infant/toddler CPR classes, but I still dread the day we have to put the skills to use. {Again, tips welcome.}
  4. Losing the baby weight – I haven’t been super open about this, but you can probably tell by my scaled-back Instagram activity that I’ve struggled with body image during pregnancy. I’ve been busy enough with work that I’m not constantly thinking about it, but I definitely don’t feel as confident in photos anymore. My fear? What if I never fit in my old clothes again? What if I’m too tired to go to the gym? I feel motivated, but not knowing how hard the adjustment will be, I fear I won’t have what it takes to get my pre-preggo body back. Seriously, so scared about this one.
  5. Up all night worrying – When people give us advice about parenthood, the first thing they tend to say is, “Enjoy your sleep now,” which isn’t exactly advice. I’m less worried about my own lack of sleep and more afraid of what could happen while I am sleeping—the chance that my baby might stop breathing. This might be my biggest fear of all because it seems like there’s so little you can do to control or prevent it. But, ever since I first heard of the Owlet Baby Monitor, I’ve been surprised how many of my friends (who already have kids), have recommended it to me. They usually mention how much they wish they’d had one with their newborn for the peace of mind that it provides. There are so many things to worry about with a new baby and the Owlet monitor gives you one less (major) thing to worry about. Just like the little clip monitor you wear on your index finger at the hospital, the Owlet monitor keeps track of your baby’s pulse and oxygen level, so even if your baby is breathing, but not getting the oxygen he/she needs, the monitor is designed to alert you—allowing you to catch a problem before it happens. I can’t imagine how much easier it would be to sleep knowing you don’t have to stay up listening to every little noise your baby makes, wondering if they’re okay. The monitor also comes with three different sock sizes to fit your baby as he/she grows. As a first-time mom, this is one gadget I am most grateful to have and really look forward to using. I can’t wait to try it and share my thoughts with you once the baby comes, so stay tuned for that. In the meantime, whether or not you’re a first-time mom, if you have a new baby, one on the way, or a friend/sister expecting a baby, I think the Owlet monitor is a must-have and would make a really great gift.

UPDATE: You can now get $10 off your purchase of the Owlet monitor through this link!

. . .

Now, it’s idea time. I would love to hear any/all tips or advice you have to alleviate my fears. What books should I read, what things have you tried that worked well with your babies, and if you haven’t had a baby yet, is there anything you’ve heard from friends, sisters, moms that you think I should try/know? Seriously, I’ll take all the advice I can get.

Thanks so much for reading and supporting me during this crazy stage of life!

Special thanks to Owlet Baby Care for sponsoring this post.

Amanda

Comments

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  1. Jen says:

    Good luck to you! As a mom of two, my best advice to you is not to have anything specific set in your mind as to how things “should” be. Every baby is different and every experience is different and having your hopes set on what you think is best may just be a set up for disappointment. So go with the flow as much as possible and just enjoy!

    Posted Feb. 17, 2016 | Reply
  2. Sophie says:

    I think the cries sound pretty similar the first few months but eventually they become more distinct and you’ll recognize what they each mean! Don’t worry about it though. They only cry for a few different reasons in the veg gunning anyway! If they aren’t hungry (which they usually are haha) then try the 5 S method! As far as nursing, the first 10 days were painful but I’d read that was common. Ever since then it has been great!! No problems. Maybe I just got really lucky or maybe new moms feel bad talking about how easy they’ve had it when others struggle so mich, I don’t know. For weight loss, what you do while pregnancy definitely makes a difference but you’ll lose weight (especially if nursing!). Your body will look different but for me, I love my body more now! I’m still in awe of what it’s capable of and treat it with a lot more respect now. :) My baby is 9 months old now and trust me, it gets easier and you will be wonderful!

    Posted Feb. 17, 2016 | Reply
  3. Caitlin says:

    I swear the fears only build as the child gets older. We have a toddler and my husband and I are always talking about new worries we have! With a new baby on the way, my fears will only be doubled!

    Posted Feb. 18, 2016 | Reply
  4. katie says:

    Breastfeeding was challenging for me. I tell you this, not to scare you, but to tell you how we endured!!! We struggled with latching and weight gain. I leaned heavily on yhe lactation consultants and they were amazing. Without them, we wouldn’t still be reastfeeding 5 months later. Ask for help!!! LC’S are happy to give it. Try dofferent nursing positions. Laying down was the only one that worked for us until baby was 3 months old or so. Be patient and enjoy the ride.

    Posted Mar. 4, 2016 | Reply
  5. Deanie says:

    Oh my goodness you are not alone with any of fears!! As a momma of 2 (14 months and almost 4 years) I can tell you that;
    1. In the beginning your little guy will not need much at all…just your warm loving arms (or a baby swing when you need/want to get other things done), diapers, and milk. It will not take you long to learn your little guy and his different cries. Until then process of elimination :-)
    2. Nursing is SO hard, especially as a first time mom. A Lactation Consultant was the best money we spent with our first son. Hang in there because it does get better and is amazing! If not, doing what is best for you and your babe are all that matters.
    3. There are so many health and safety worries as parents. My only advice on this one is to educate yourself, take the CPR class and know that IF anything happens your natural maternal instinct will kick in and you will “just know” what to do in that situation.
    4. You will loose the weight! Even just having the desire to means you will have the motivation to. Remember it takes 9 months to put on the weight and grow your little guy so give yourself at least the same time to loose the weight without any pressure. Breastfeeding, if you’re able to do it, helps. Talking the baby for walks is the best mentally and physically those first few months. I was so much more hungry while breastfeeding than while pregnant, because it burns so many calories and takes a lot of your energy…so don’t be alarmed if you’re ravenous. I actually weighed less 1 year AFTER my first son than I did before I got pregnant.
    Yor got this momma!!! Wishing you all the best 😘

    Posted Mar. 8, 2016 | Reply
  6. Hey Amanda!! I was thinking about you today & wondering if you’d had your baby… maybe today’s the day! You’re going to be a wonderful mama! We use an inclined rocker (from Target or Amazon) for the first few months, which helps the baby in case he spits up or chokes while he/you are sleeping. Plus, it’s nice to just reach your hand out and rock him back to sleep :)

    I probably would fall into the horror-stories category of breastfeeding… but all I’ll say is get yourself a nipple shield if it’s too painful! That has saved me with both of my boys. AND- if breastfeeding just doesn’t work for you, don’t feel badly about switching to formula!!! You’ll still be a great mom – the most important thing is that the baby is loved, taken care of & gets fed. People can be so dramatic about how “breast is best,” but seriously- just do whatever works best for you. Plenty of babies are formula-fed & they’re still healthy and happy and fine. Don’t let guilt make you suffer through ongoing pain if it’s just not working. Another solution is to pump– that’s what I’ve been doing with my second boy (nippleshield at night, pumping during the day). Anyway, good luck! I hope it’s easier for you than it is for me:)

    And with losing the weight, your body will definitely bounce back!! I’ve had that fear too. But all it takes is eating healthy, exercising, and TIME. Biggest clincher — just takes time, which might be the hardest part. But you are beautiful inside & out– pre-pregnant, pregnant, or postpartum! Hope everything goes well for you! I’d love to hear from you if you ever have questions or wanna chat! Miss ya!

    Posted Mar. 9, 2016 | Reply
  7. […] having Benjamin, I shared five fears of becoming a new mom. One of those fears was that I’d be up all night worrying about whether Benj is still […]

    Posted Apr. 25, 2016
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